So I was sitting at my desk today, working, and I randomly started to think about Depends diapers for old people, and how much it must suck to have to wear them.
Then I got to thinking about old people in general, specially old lady lesbians, and I began to ponder where all the elderly lesbians go when they are too old to be cool and hip without breaking a hip. I mean, they must be out there somewhere, sporadically dispersed amongst the throngs of elderly straight couples that have made it through the years. I'm sure there are many that currently live in straight-people retirement homes and are subject to the same old Bingo nights and ice cream socials that are frequented by horny old men who still take Viagra with the hope they might get lucky.
No gay woman should be subjected to that kind of insanity, especially in the elderly years where they are too old to put up with that kind of nonsense. I've recently heard of several GLBT Retirement Communities popping up in the good old US of A, but what about an all-inclusive Lesbian elderly resort? Sure, we love our gay men, but clearly they would dominate the shuffle boards, hog the community televisions, and take over the gym with their bitchy, over-the-top attitudes.
Imagine this - a retirement community filled with elderly Lesbians, a place available for them to live and relax after spending many hard working years, a place filled with lesbians all day long, as far as the eye can see. Of course, there would be the married Lesbian housing where couples could spend their remaining days with their loved one, and then there would also be the single Lesbian housing for the old ladies who still wanna get down and party. Imagine the hoards of dykes in wheelchairs playing basketball on the outer courts. Imagine the 80 year old femmes at the community salon getting their thinning hair permed and dyed purple. Imagine the community living room playing constant re-runs of "Golden Girls; The Dyke Years" (where Dorothy is a full-blown lesbian and Blanche Marie's bi).
As I sat imagining all this and more, I began to think that with the recent
development of GLBT communities, a Lesbian-only Community is not far out of our reach. I dream of someday being able to retire in an all-lesbian retirement community, where men are but a distant dream, and women can freely roam the compound waving their rainbow flags and enjoying the typical peacefulness that comes with a whole bunch of lesbians living together in a small area.
...wait a minute...