The L Word Episode 502

What can possibly take place in a day in the life of a group of fictional lesbians? What can’t take place?

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Shane On Fire

Last week Shane and Page broke up and someone burnt down WAX. In my book that’s pretty big. Not to mention just filming something like that had to be super expensive.

You would think there would have been a little bit more about it this episode. Perhaps, I don’t know, something along the lines of Shane crying over charred pieces of plastic shampoo bottles. Not to mention, I’m curious to see who the culprit was.

But no… instead of focusing on something important or interesting we get to watch Shane get off.

Jenny hooks Shane up with a hair styling gig for her Boss’s daughter’s wedding and she does the bridal party… and the mom. Literally does them…pretty gross… but funny at the same time. At least she drew the line when it came to the bride. Shane does have moral standards… no matter how distorted and fucked they might be.

Did anyone notice the clever foreshadowing earlier in the episode? When the momma Hasley says, “I’m gunna need you to do me when your finished with them.” Pretty genius don’t you think. (That was sarcasm by the way)

Don’t Ask Tasha, Don’t Tell Tasha

Alice lets the cat out of the bag that Tasha is being investigated for homosexual conduct while out to dinner with Jodi and Bette. This causes a minor conflict between the couple.

Tasha wants to keep things hush hush, but Alice doesn’t understand why Tasha wants to be a part of something where she can’t be who she is.

It’s understandable that with Tasha being investigated Alice is having a hard time.

But sometimes we have to make something rational out of the irrational… What if Tasha didn’t have much of a family life and was a bad-ass teen. Something happened that made her want to change her life. She saw that joining the military could give her the opportunity to become a part of something stable that might make a difference in the world.

The military can be a family for some people. It’s hard to give up on something you believe in and love no matter how wrong and demeaning it may be. It goes along the same lines as abusive relationships or even coming out of the closet. You don’t want to be hated by someone/thing that you love. And the possibility of losing it scares you, so sometimes you rather just deal with it.

Maybe during the course of this investigation Tasha will have a change of heart. Hopefully she will realize that the love that she has for Alice and who she is shouldn’t be compromised for some archaic belief.

Time will tell.

Single White Schecter

Before I go on my rant about Jenny, I have to give props to Mia Kirshner. I love all the girls on the show and think their awesome but Mia is my number one. She plays this part so well and I can’t help but admire her abilities. I’ve been a fan for years and I think that her performance on the L Word has been nothing but fantastic and this year takes the wedding cake.

Last week, Schecter’s assistant left because she was treated like shit… Now that vulture has a new assistant, Adel, who happens to be her biggest fan.

Now, if I was writing for the show this would be the perfect opportunity to stick it to Jenny and have a little fun doing it. I’m hoping that Adel starts off sweet and innocent and then becomes a super-fucking psycho. I want to see some Single White Female Action. I think that would be so great.

I can just picture it ( insert dreamy transition).

All the girls are at the Planet, sitting around sipping on soy Lattes, in walks Jenny followed by her Jenny clone ( JC, aka Jenny 2 , aka Adel).


(whispers to Bette)- You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.

Bette raises her eyebrows and then looks at Tina and both roll their eyes. Jenny walks up to the table.

Jenny –

Hello Shane. Ladies…

Jenny sits next to Shane. JC pulls a chair over and squeezes in to sit next to Jenny, pushing Kit out of the way. Kit looks at Max who shakes his head.

After a brief conversation about dyke stuff and an encyclopedia like definition of transgender, Adel gets up to go to the bathroom.

Whats up with your assistant Jenny?


Well, What do you mean by that.. Alice.


Well, Jenny, or should I say, Jenny One, haven’t you noticed anything a little strange about her.


I don’t know what you’re talking about…Alice


Um, ( scoffs) haven’t you noticed that Adel kind of, well, walks, dresses and acts exactly like you. She’s like your clone.


I just think that she admires me. I take it as a compliment… and I don’t think there is anything wrong with the way that she is dressing or behaving…Alice.


That’s right, because you’re Jenny Schecter.

Before Jenny can respond to Alice’s comment Adel returns from the bathroom.


(To Adel)- Oh, there you are. We have to go. We have better things to do.


I’m sure you do.

Jenny takes Adel by the arm. They leave the planet.


okay, I guess she never saw Single White Female

Later on in the season, Adel becomes more and more obsessed with Jenny. But by the time Jenny pulls her head out of her own ass it’s too late and Adel has already ruined her life.

That’s just something I had in my head… it would be fun wouldn’t it!

Fatal Les-traction

Now that Phyllis has had her coming of age party she feels the need to spread her labia… I mean wings… and see other people. Joyce isn’t taking it all that great. Well, its just not sinking in. She seems to think that Phyllis is acting rash and will come to her senses given time.

I think Phyllis should have paid more attention to the intensity of lesbian relationships and not the lingo when studying the lesbian life style…some bitches be crazy. I guess we all have to learn the hard way.

Phyllis is desperate and asks Bette for advice. She receives the same advice that Alice did last season. Some lesbians you have to break up with more than once. Sensible advice but she forgot one more thing…sometimes you have to get a restraining order too.

Helena’s knight in terry cloth towel

While the girls on the outside are dealing with their own drama Helena is trying to get by in the pen. She’s not doing the best job.

The only good advice the sisters sledge gave her on the last visit was “Don’t drop the soap”… and what does she do… she drops the soap (something else I didn’t see coming). As a result Helena gets accosted by Jackie some scarred faced psycho who wants a little action.

Not to fear! Dusty, Helena’s cell mate comes to her rescue and claims Helena as her bitch. Later that night they get it on and find out that Dusty is just locked up for tax fraud and not a serial killer. What a relief.

Special note…The shower scene… it’s a little painful to watch. Ya’ know because of all the florescent lighting and lime green walls… yuck… it was like being in a Todd Oldman nightmare.

My favorite part of this week’s episode is when Kit visits Helena in jail. I think I saw a little Jackie brown walking down that corridor. Take a look.

Check out the previews for next week on OurChart or Showtime or Youtube.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, please leave your comment, after your reading is thru.

1 comment:

Lesberita said...

I am so with you on the Mia Kirshner thing. It takes a lot of guts to play such a conniving and much-hated character like Jenny Schector. I think Mia is a very talented actress and I'm very interested to see what direction Ilene and the L Word writers take her character.