5/12/08

The Lesbian Mission Impossible

Hi everyone. As an anonymous reader of Lesbiatopia, I've noticed that many posts seem to address the issue of lesbian dating. It's something that no one understands, but everyone wishes they could define it. It's something we're all going to do, but it sure would be easier if everyone knew exactly what it is we're doing. I'm not here to answer the questions or solve the problem. I have been very unsuccessful at lesbian dating myself. But I'm on a mission to figure it out, and I thought you all might want to join me on this journey.



I'm going to be a lesbian secret agent. I'm going to enter the big scary world of lesbian dating to figure out what works and what doesn't. Ultimately, I want to find out if there's anyone out there for me. It's hard for me to find women that I'm attracted to. My friends say that I'm too picky. My mom thinks it's because deep down, I'm actually straight. But I think it's because I know what I really like. I know what turns me on, I know what kind of spark and chemistry that I want to find. I know what qualities my ideal partner will have, and I know how it will feel when I find someone who fits.

With help from some of my good friends, we have come up with the Lesbian Mission Impossible. I will go on 100 dates with 100 different women. I won't be too picky, because then I'd never get it done. But I'll go out on a date with any woman who asks me. And I will ask many of them out myself. Along the way, I'll try to figure out what it is that constitutes a lesbian date in the minds of the women I meet, and hopefully, I can come to some sort of conclusion in the end.

Although secretly, what I would really love is to find her. The woman of my dreams. I'm a hopeless romantic, and I believe in happily ever after. I believe that I can find one person who fits me and we can make it work for the rest of our lives. I have only been attracted a handful of people in my entire life, so I don't think there are very many out there with much potential. But if I try 100, surely there will be one or two, right?

Wish me luck - hopefully my mission won't be completely impossible. Feel free to offer your suggestions, and check back often for updates as I chronicle my adventures!

-L.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

That sounds really awesome. I hope you find what youre looking for. :)

ReneeG said...

I'm really looking forward to your reading your stories as you go through this journey of dating in the lesbian world. Good luck!

Unknown said...

Maturity and a commitment in a relationship is what I usualy look in dating friends as potencial partner.

The Professor said...

I was just thinking about writing an article about lesbian dating! After I touched on it briefly in my previous article (On the Importance of Girl Friends), I realized that there's so much more to say about this topic!

I think one major thing that makes lesbian dating more difficult than the hetero variety is that straight couples have a sort of "template" or stereotypical idea of what a date is. With a few modifications here and there, it mostly looks like this: Boy asks out girl, they meet at bar, have drinks, have dinner, he pays, they catch a local band at a club, they take a walk along the boardwalk, talk about themselves, he walks her back to her car, kisses her on the cheek, asks if he can see her again, and she says yes.

Unfortunately, we don't seem to have the same thing. (Although, I personally think a slight variation of this model would be perfect...) As lesbians, we hesitate to use the word date, so there's always a question of whether or not it really IS a date. Then, the lesbian tendency to move way too fast (you all know what I'm talking about) causes us to give up the dating process entirely and move immediately into serious relationship.

I'm working on developing this idea into what could turn into a seminar on lesbian dating. I would encourage you to be careful that you are clear about your intentions, especially with the way lesbians tend to move quickly. But do keep us updated, because I would love to see how this project turns out! Good luck!