Lesbian Politics: A NOTE FROM ONE POLITICAL SORE LOSER TO ANOTHER
by Cynthia Rodriguez
Resident Bookworm and Book Reviewer Extraordinaire
I've had a crush on Hillary Clinton for years.
I know a lot of women do, but I'm not ashamed to publicly admit it. I'd be her intern anytime. I remember back in the day being at the Puerto Rican Day Parade in NYC seeing her march along with my peeps. I remember thinking way back then she would run for President some day.
Fast forward to 2008. Even before then, when she announced she was running for President of The United States, I think I had an orgasm. When I learned Obama was running for President too, I felt angry and cheated because I felt he was taking the "minority" spotlight away from her. I thought to myself, "No, no, no...this is supposed to be her year, her time! He's gonna fuck it up for her! Damn it!"
The party splitting campaigning took it's toll in many forms. I watched it on a national level, and I observed it on a personal level which spilled all over at my work place. On one hand it was great that so many of us are so involved in the politics of it all, and on the other hand, we had quite the Hillary/Obama rivalry going that at certain moments became a little wicked and out of control to the point that our boss had to intervene and play referee at times.
I went to see Hillary and Bill speak live when they were in the hood. I got involved in her campaign, went to a Hillary voter's party...been there, done that, got the Hillary t-shirt, (I really do have the shirt, and about twelve Hillary buttons. I wonder if I could sell those on E-Bay now, just kidding...maybe a few years from now...) For the most part, I kept track of who was winning what state, either by CNN, radio and/or newspaper. When it was Pennsylvania's turn I stayed up past midnight that evening on Election Day watching CNN for about 6-7 hours straight. I watched the count down for the polls to close like it was New Year's, down to the second, 10-----9-----8... Held tight to my Hillary sign and hooted and hollered. You would've thought I was watching the Super Bowl. All I needed was that foam finger thingy that said "We're #1".
In the end, when she lost, what a devastating blow. I really thought she was gonna get it. That threw me into a political state of depression for weeks. Yes, I take it very personally, thank you very much. It took me a while to get over my grieving period. The only thing that kept me going is the hope she would at least be chosen as the Vice Presidential candidate.
When that didn't happen, it took me right over the edge. I went into an angry frenzy that made me look like I just came out of the movie, "The Exorcist". I needed a couple of days to get over my wrath. At this point, it took the intervention of a couple of co-workers to realize I needed some professional help. Well, maybe not professional, but I needed to do something to turn it around. It was over, and some type of closure was required.
So, I went to my first Obama party. The last night of the Democratic National Convention, to hear him speak. It wasn't as irksome as I imagined it to be, however, I was definitely overwhelmed by the surrounding Obama fever. Part of me felt like a traitor. I felt like I had just cheated on my life long partner with a man. All the shirts, signs, buttons drove me to the bar next door. I figured, I was there. I made it through, and I was supporting the Democratic Party. Although, I realized my residual Hillary feelings were still lingering every time the Clintons were mentioned. I'd "WHOOOO!" all over that, then I'd slouch down in my chair and look around to see if anyone had noticed. I thought for sure those Obama freaks would start flinging their hot wings at me.
The point to all this, I speak to all of you hard core Hillary girls out there, like me. I understand. I feel your pain. I know. However, the bottom line is, don't be stupid. Don't vote for McCain, or vote for him now just because he has a vagina by his side or NOT vote at all, out of spite. That accomplishes nothing. If anything, if Obama gets in and messes up, we can always say, "Hey, don't blame me. I voted for Hillary".