12/12/08

Dear Santa:

Dear Santa:

There's no point in lying to you, Big Guy. It hasn't been my best year. But we both know that you give all kinds of things to people way worse than me! For that reason, I don't feel shy about asking.

Since I'm limited on my stamps, I thought I'd just post my wish list to you here. Hope you can manage to get me all of these but I'll understand if you have to leave 1 off. Thanks a mil!

-Sinnerviewer

P.S. - Since you know that experiences are more important to me than things, I thought up a few that I would enjoy a lot. If anyone can make it happen, it will be you. That being said, here are the ones at the top of my list:

1. I wanna go back to Italy! This time, I'd prefer to go with someone who actually wants to be there with me - someone like my Sweet Melissa. I'd like to take her there and tell her how much I love her while we look at the scenery and drink some wine. I might even want to ask her something really important. That is at the top of my list, Santa. Make it happen!
2. I would love to work on the set of the new movie that Joan Jett is backing about her old band called "The Runaways" (also featuring Lita Ford). This movie will be directed by cutting edger Floria Sigismondi. It's also gonna star Kristen Stewart (Bella from "Twilight" will play Joan Jett - odd casting, I know!). Even if I was a janitor, I would just love to be a part of that project. So Santa, do you know anyone that can get me in?3. I need some time with Jon Bon Jovi. He's the only man who sometimes makes me question my lesbian sexuality. And that statement actually came up in my divorce hearing back in May so I think I really deserve him now. I want to write a screenplay about me & my friends from high school who are now knocking on 40's door are going to kidnap him and try to make him be our friend but we discover that he's not what makes us happy after all. I was going to call it "The Kidnapping of Jon Bon Jovi" and I think it would be a fantastic movie. I just need to convince Jon to work with me so I think a few weeks in Hawaii should do it. Could you also please keep his wife in New Jersey? She's a multi-level black belt in Karate and I don't want any trouble. Also, could he please be wearing this?
Okay, as for "things" - I just have a few of them:

1. Some good wine. I like Shiraz so that would be ideal. I also like Merlot. Whatever you can get your hands on would be appreciated.
2. A hand-held GPS. I really like to geocache. (www.geocaching.com) I want one that is WAAS-enabled and easy for me to operate. Please don't send me anything that my teenagers will have to teach me to operate. They already make fun of me enough as it is.

3. I need a laptop cooler. This damn thing is burning my leg right now!
In fact, I had a lot more to ask for but I need to go now before my laptop sets my sheets on fire. Thanks again, Santa.

Peace Out!

**You can visit Sinnerviewer's personal blog by clicking HERE.

7 comments:

Sweet Melissa said...

Maybe you'll get something on your list if you're lucky.

If I ever meet Joan I'm going to ask her if the leather bras are comfy. They look so stiff!

I would love to see the JBJ movie. Who would play you & your friends?

And what did you want to ask me in Italy? ;)

ReneeG said...

I am so with you on that laptop cooler! How's a girl supposed to get any work done when with 3rd degree burns on her legs every day?

DawgDyke said...

Move the laptop cooler to the top of your list .. main reason; the heat reduces the life of the computer .. plus the leg burn isn't a fashion statement eh?

Mandi said...

Geocaching? No effing way! I've been reading your blog for a short while now (I stumbled on it while reading afterellen.com at work when I likely should have been taking care of a patient) and didn't realize you were the geocaching type. I love it!

Tasha said...

Jon Bon Jovi?!

Shannon said...

Sweet:
Reese Witherspoon would play Kelly.
Amy Winehouse would play Michelle.
Kate Moennig would play me.
-OR- We could all play ourselves and Jon could play himself and we'd spend 6 months on the set making friends with him.

Renee/Dawg: Yes! I badly need one.

Mandi: Oh, yes! Love that geocaching despite not being that "type" - who would not enjoy that fun little hobby?

Tasha: Yes. Jon Bon Jovi. Don't ask my why. It is what it is...

Anonymous said...

Here are some thoughts:

- If you're looking for a nice wine (that's not too expensive), my favorite is Corvo - it's a sicilian wine that makes me so very happy.

- Don't question your sexuality if you like Bon Jovi...I think he's the closest thing to Pink's six packs I've seen on a guy.

- I'll be at the Amalfi Coast with the gf this spring...I'll send my thoughts your way? It's the best I can do. Unlike you, however, I've never been there...and being half sicilian, that's a damn shame.

I wish you well in your quest. Especially that laptop cooler...you know, you wouldn't want to reduce sensitivity in those places with bad burns.

ouch.